I took a step.
May not seem big.
But to me...
It is a leap.
A leap across an abyss.
Another step.
Towards repairing the damage.
Towards fixing my heart.
Towards reconnecting myself.
Towards finding myself.
Just another step.
Currently reading:
Eclipse (Twilight, Book 3)
By Stephenie Meyer
Release date: 07 August, 2007
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Losing It... Losing Me.
I hate this feeling.
It is the sense of being disconnected from yourself and everything around you. Being a total robot on auto-pilot. Drifting through life.
I am out of control. I am just going through the motions. Doing what I need to survive. Not an excellent way to live.
Last year... I was connected. I was here. I was real. But I wasn't happy.
Now... I'm not. And still not happy.
I need something or someone to connect me back to myself. If I don't.. I am going disappear. Forever.
But who or what that is... I have not a single clue.
And that honestly scares me.
Currently listening:
Big Girls Don’t Cry
By Fergie
Release date: 16 July, 2007
It is the sense of being disconnected from yourself and everything around you. Being a total robot on auto-pilot. Drifting through life.
I am out of control. I am just going through the motions. Doing what I need to survive. Not an excellent way to live.
Last year... I was connected. I was here. I was real. But I wasn't happy.
Now... I'm not. And still not happy.
I need something or someone to connect me back to myself. If I don't.. I am going disappear. Forever.
But who or what that is... I have not a single clue.
And that honestly scares me.
Currently listening:
Big Girls Don’t Cry
By Fergie
Release date: 16 July, 2007
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
I am America’s Next Top Model
So... I had this awesome dream last night... Went something like this...
I was a contestant on America's Next Top Model, in the final-like four or something. It was time for the photoshoot and commerial shoot. It was this really cool apartment set for promoting this new line of perfumes. We were supposed to be international jewel theives, attempting to steal the perfume from a glass case.
There were male models acting as the FBI agents barraging in on our heist. The models were actors...
Turns out my partner in crime was Gerard Butler (AKA The Phantom and King Leondias). *drool*
I waited and watched the other's do their shoots. Which were honest crap. It came my turn to do it... Gerard smiled at me and went to start to talk to me on set when...
I FREAKING WOKE UP!!!
He is finally in my dreams... and I wake up. How incredibly cruel is that for you?
Currently watching:
The Phantom of the Opera (Two-Disc Special Edition)
Release date: 03 May, 2005
I was a contestant on America's Next Top Model, in the final-like four or something. It was time for the photoshoot and commerial shoot. It was this really cool apartment set for promoting this new line of perfumes. We were supposed to be international jewel theives, attempting to steal the perfume from a glass case.
There were male models acting as the FBI agents barraging in on our heist. The models were actors...
Turns out my partner in crime was Gerard Butler (AKA The Phantom and King Leondias). *drool*
I waited and watched the other's do their shoots. Which were honest crap. It came my turn to do it... Gerard smiled at me and went to start to talk to me on set when...
I FREAKING WOKE UP!!!
He is finally in my dreams... and I wake up. How incredibly cruel is that for you?
Currently watching:
The Phantom of the Opera (Two-Disc Special Edition)
Release date: 03 May, 2005
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